Taking Responsibility

One of the keys to Positive Sexuality is taking responsibility for it. Owning it. Caring about it.

Think about the process of learning to drive a car. Society determines when you are old enough, and what steps you must take to earn the privilege of owning and operating a vehicle. You sit through classes, spend hours driving, and take written and practical exams. Pass, and they give you a license to drive.

But that's just step 1. Owning a car is another whole story: car payments, insurance, registration, inspection, maintenance, repairs, gas . . . all of which need to be addressed regularly and periodically. Drop the ball on any of these areas, it could cost you lots of money and you could lose the privilege of driving or owning a car.

These are all very serious, age-appropriate types of concerns that a 16 year-old will face, and we work hard as a society to make sure that they take steps to learn what they need to know in order to drive safely and not harm the rest of us. We make them get jobs to pay for the insurance, so they'll learn to be at least a little responsible for driving.

And yet, we do so little by comparison when it comes to our health, especially in terms of sexual health (mentally and physically). The consequences for both and individual and society are as severe when a reckless, irresponsible person is in the backseat of the car as when they are behind the wheel.

It's not hard to talk with our kids about driving, about the dangers they face and the enormous responsibility it is. Sex has similar life or death consequences. Most of us are fine, but some of us get caught in the wreckage. We wouldn't dream of sending our kids out to drive without a huge amount of preparation. And yet every day some find themselves in sexual situations, totally unprepared . . . .